FINAL BLOG POST

I cannot believe how fast the semester went by. When I wrote my first blog post my goals were to pass and to fix comma splices. My seventh blog post I stated that my goal was to get an A. My goals since than have not changed as the semester went on. I have been working hard to get the A, however I think I will end up with a B. I have noticed that I am better at figuring out when to use a comma and when not to. The class taught me how to effectively revise my paper and my peers paper. Peer review was always beneficial and I valued the feed back I got from my fellow classmates.


As I grow as a writer I want to continue to effectively revise my drafts before handing it in. Even if a class does not do activities such as peer review, I can always ask a friend or family member to help me revise it.  A weakness I will work on as a writer would be to further develop my ideas more. This is what I struggled with most this semester. I began to see reoccurring comments about have a great idea that needed to be more expanded. As i rewrite my ad analysis draft, I now realize the mistake I am making and how much better my paper sounds after I expanded my ideas. This class overall has helped me to grow as a writer and identify what I need to work on most. 

Assignment #14

For my portfolio, I have chosen to revise my ad analysis paper. My ad analysis paper has a strong thesis statement and has good claims that all relate to the thesis statement. In my opinion, I felt like I enjoyed writing this essay more than the others in the semester. I was proud of my claims that I came up with, and I felt that I clearly and vividly described the ad so that someone who has not seen the ad, would be able to picture it in their minds. 


However, after receiving feedback from my essay I learned that while I had well thought out claims, I needed to further explain them. This was not the first time I have received this comment on an essay, so I figured I would reread my essay and try to fix the problem for my portfolio review. First I will read each paragraph individually. Then I will ask myself, "did I explain this as much as I could?" If not, I will go back and further expand on my ideas. If yes, then I can move onto the next paragraph. These steps will help me to further revise my essay.


Also, I need to check for grammar and mechanics mistakes. When I type a paper, I often times submit it without fully rechecking my work. I will make sure to print my essay when I am done revising it, and then read it over as if I am peer reviewing with another student. This will allow me to be grammar free and have all of my thoughts clearly expressed. 

Assignment #13

In the essay written by Frank LoMonte,"Free Speech off Campus," I examined how important it is to mention a counterargument. LoMonte raised many ideas that critics and skeptics would agree with. However, to strengthen his argument he provided facts and examples to back up his own argument. In my fourth essay I will mention counterarguments that people might have while reading my paper, and try to find ways and examples to disprove those beliefs


In the essay about selling ones organs in return for money, we discussed in class how the authors tone ultimately weakened her argument. The author had a very harsh and one sided tone that drew readers away from taking her side in the position. She did not take in consideration how the people actually selling their own kidney might experience health risks and get underpaid for selling their own organs. When writing my essay, I will try to have an authoritative tone, while showing compassion and relating to my readers to help strengthen my essay and argument. 


Lastly, in the essay written by Frank LoMonte, "Free Speech off Campus," I also examined how effective  his argument was by not being bias. He never stated, "I don't think that free speech is important because...." or "When I was in college......". LoMonte was able to get his position and point across without actually stating it, rather he used his facts and ideas to convey his argument correctly to the readers. When writing my essay, I will be sure to avoid using first person or personal experiences to avoid sounding biased. 

Assignment #12

Thesis: Although public transportation is ideal, for students who do not have this option should not have to pay for parking each semester.

Ethos:

• Public transportation is ideal, however some students do not have this option.
• Since I am a student and currently effected by this, readers can think I'm trustworthy. 

Pathos:

• Students are already under a lot of stress because of the amount of money college requires, parking permits just add to that stress
• Students get aggravated when they are late for classes and have no open parking spaces

Logical:

• Students are already required to pay for a U-Pass, whether or not they use it
• In winter conditions with snow, the parking lots do not get properly cleaned and we lose spaces due to piles of snow. 
• Parking levels are designated based on class and what a student cannot afford. The less money you have, the worst parking spaces are available to you.

My most convincing evidence is that parking level options are unfair because it is designated based on class. The most expensive level is 1 and the cheapest is level 3. Level 3 designated parking areas are far away from major buildings and is on the roof of the parking structure. Students should not feel less entitled to others because they cannot afford better parking spots. Some students cannot control the fact that they have to drive to school. There is no major train station by campus, and for students who live in the suburbs are not able to take the CTA buses. 

My least convincing evidence is in winter conditions with snow, the parking lots do not get properly cleaned and we lose spaces due to piles of snow. Although this statement is true, there is no way I can prove this or back it up with more facts. Im not aware of all of the maintenance that goes into the parking lots on campus. Also, there is limited areas where snow trucks can pile up the snow instead of the parking lots.

Assignment #11- Errors

1. Comma Splices

• I tend to struggle most with comma splices. Sometimes I get confused whether or not to use a comma or semi colon.  This effects my writing because it is grammatically wrong if I chose the wrong one. To prevent this from happening in the future, I will try to go back to the worksheet on comma splices and run-ons to refresh my memory. 
• Another problem I struggle with is expanding on my thoughts. I have noticed on my last two essay's your comments were about expanding more on my ideas. This effects my writing because even though I may have written good main points, I need to expand more to back it up and make it credible. Without expanding on my thoughts, my main points just gets brushed to the side and forgotten. I will pay more attention to this in my next essay. When I say an idea I will make sure to fully explain my thoughts. 
• Lastly, and error is being to wordy. Sometimes when I feel I have written as much as I can and my paper does not meet the length requirement, I start adding unnecessary words and phrases. This effects my writing because being excessively wordy strays the reader away from my main points and gets distracting. I can prevent this by gathering more information so that I am able to meet the length requirement without being wordy. 

Extra Credit

            For our next paper, we are asked to write an argumentative paper about one of the three articles given to us. I decided to write about the article discussing free speech. Personally, I am looking forward to writing this paper because facebook is something that I have been using for four years. I also have a blog account, twitter, and tumblr. All of these social media networks are ways of being able to express myself and connecting with friends. When I first read the article about Amanda Tatro, I was confused about why it was such a controversial statement. After discussing it in class, I was able to better understand why it was taken to court, but my opinion still stands that she should not be punished.             I will argue that while Tatro made poor choices on what to post on her Facebook, the context of her post should have been investigated. If it was a meaningless joke, then she should not be punished.

            People make jokes and say things all the time that they do not mean literally, that is what I think Amanda Tatro did. Teenagers and young adults tend to over exaggerate and be dramatic. Just because we post something on Facebook does not mean we are going to go out and do it. While I do not condone what Amanda Tatro decided to post on her Facebook, I also do not think legal action should have taken place without first finding out if she wanted to cause physical harm to a human being or cadaver. The author of the article makes a good point, if courts are not careful of their decisions they make it can greatly affect our future. Universities can have the power to control what we can and cannot say over the Internet and take legal action if they think it is necessary. 

Assignment 10

Peer review is a helpful tool in our English class. I find it effective because classmates might be able to pick up on something in our paper that the write cannot or missed while reading it themselves. For instance, while we think we are correcting our grammar in our paper by using spell check, spell check can not always be trusted because it could confuse words such as "than" or "then", which have different uses in sentences. Also, peer review is effective because while we read other classmates papers, it gives us ideas and points we did not think about using that can be helpful in our own paper as well. A way peer review could be improved is by letting the students chose their own group. I know as being a more shy student, I feel more comfortable in a group I have previously worked in before where we have already gotten to know each other.

I think my strength as a peer reviewer is the feedback and marks I make on the other persons essay. I am honest and if I see something that is wrong or confusing I will circle it and give suggestions to my classmate. A weakness that I have as a peer reviewer is that I am horrible at comma splices so I am not a hundred percent sure if my classmates sentence is correct when they use or do not use commas.

I think that peer review is most effective at the beginning of the writing process. I find that the sooner others read my paper, the longer I have to fix my paper and make corrections on it. The smaller the group the more helpful it is for me. Big groups get too distracting and people are more likely to feel comfortable in a smaller group. Lastly, I think two class periods is enough time for the peer review process to take place. It also gives students time to take the peer review sheet home, and fully fill it out.